Trying to figure out what to do with your marriage?
Together we can sort it out.
In the best of circumstances, divorce is heavily emotional. It can create negative reactions and is often the reason people act out of character.
In the content and videos on this site, you’re going to read or hear me talk about things that happened to me. You’ll read or hear the emotions in my words and voice. That’s because it’s real. It’s my story from my point of view.
Being emotional is normal for everyone involved. My story is meant only to share with you how crazy divorce can be and give you the comfort of knowing you’re not alone.
This website and any information contained herein is solely for informational purposes. While it is important that you educate yourself, nothing herein should be construed as legal advice. We urge you to contact an attorney for advice pertaining to your legal needs.
You’ve had it.
You cannot go ONE MORE DAY with things as they are.
Things like silence, lies, disrespect, nagging, cheating, and boredom. Things like toothpaste in the sink, clothing on the floor, and keeping score. Endless arguments about money (not enough or who spent what), sex (not enough or who wants what and how often), and how the two of you communicate (not enough, too much, and badly).
You’ve HAD IT.
I get it.
I get that you’re feeling miserable at the state of your marriage, and that you’re desperate for change. I get that your first impulse is to blame your wife / husband / partner for what they do, don’t do, or should or shouldn’t do. I totally get that you JUST KNOW that things would be SO MUCH BETTER if they would stop / start / change what they’re doing or not doing.
If you’re in HAD IT mode,
you’re what is referred to by Discernment Counselors as the “leaning out” partner. You may be leaning out in thought (I don’t know what else to do except divorce), word (I’m leaving you), and/or deed (I’m outta here, whether to a separate bedroom, a separate residence, or an affair). Your feelings may be in direct opposition to your partner’s, who is typically “leaning in,” as in wanting to work on/save the marriage once they understand that you’ve HAD IT.
What is it?
Discernment Counseling is specifically designed for couples where one is leaning out and the other is leaning in. These couples don’t do well in traditional marriage counseling that is designed to solve problems in the marriage.
Discernment Counseling doesn’t solve marital problems, it discerns whether the problems CAN be solved. Sessions involve separate conversations with each spouse/partner, as well as time as a couple.
Discernment Counseling is Short-term,
Usually 1-5 sessions.
It leads to a decision whether to divorce, to maintain the status quo, or to give the marriage a major last effort via a clear and agreed upon agenda for change. It’s perfect for couples who are unsure about divorce, who want to take one more look at their relationship before making a permanent decision, and who want to give the marriage another chance even if their spouse/partner is moving toward divorce.
Having trouble deciding what to do about your marriage?